My day couldn't get any worse.
With all the heart ache from today and the guy..it's nothing much.but my mind won't get off it. Annoying.
I hopped in the shower. Memories flooding through my head. Good memories of course. As they make their way down the time line to now they start getting twisted. I closed my eyes while The steaming water fell upon my head and when I opened my eyes and saw where my little brother use to sit when if help bathe him.
My heart couldn't hold together and my eyes filled with the biggest tears in the world. I was being cut with a hot knife.
In my head I thought to myself..
Why me? Why couldn't he just appear and spend a day with me? Just a day. That's all I was asking for. Just to hear his laugh and have his big brown eyes look into mine and have him smile.
As I knelt on the tiled ground in the shower a peace came over me. Almost as if it was my little brother coming to comfort me through my heartache. I realized I was being selfish. Yes. I miss him..more than anything actually. But I'm so grateful for prayer..even the smallest ones that we hold in our heart. I'm so grateful that I was born into this gospel and for the examples around me. I don't know how I'd handle my situations without it.
<3 <3
But for now. ~ill cya soon then
I love you.
