Because of you.

Streams of mascara and red swollen eyes are not a good combination on this girl right here..And my cozy blankets, stuffed animals and pillows are definatly not meeting satisfactory needs of any cuddling craves I'm having right now. If that makes any sense

I couldn't.. Could not keep in the salty tears from rolling down..gosh, more like pouring down my cheeck tonight. I mean, who doesn't after reading hunter koffords post on sweet coop. Watching her video over and over and over and over and over again.  I couldn't help but to think of my sweet angel. Joaquin. 

Loosing a member of a family is not easy.  You never .. {here comes the tears} never .. Know when your loved one will move onto the next life. But I couldn't be more blessed than to have him in my life for 6 years! And to know where he is now, he's completly happy. He's with Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ who I'm sure are giving him the biggest hugs and loves! And to know that makes me happy.

Thanks hunter kofford. That video .. Hit home. Missing my sweet sweet angel. 

Many blessing. Many prayers . Much love

Xx Desi

Xx

Guys I legit had a daddy daughter date tonight! Me ,my sister and my papa {excuse my for the impropper grammer} got into our car of ours and busted to the one and only stomach filling Texas Roadhouse, zoomed zoomed out of there and headed to the cinema to see Now you see me! {freaking recommend} 

If you have no idea what the funky monkey I just said. Stop now. Don't read any further and go buy tickets to see that movie. And psh.. If you're sitting in the Corner crying because you have no one to go with.. Take me! Because.. Duh! Ill see it again. Seriously though.

Next, happy late birthday shout out to one of my bestfriends! I might not be one of his bestfriends. But he sure as heck is one of mine! Guys.. This dood let me cry my mascara river and wipe my knarly boogies into his shirt whenever I had a hard time.wait. He still does. Love him!! 

You guys wanna know how old he is.. He's 1234578961335 years young! Hehe 

The Lord watches over you. He loves you! LOVES you. Love love loves you!!

I had a lil break down the other night. Missing my little Broski more than anything.. I started to cry because I was feeling so alone. I wanted to burry my beautiful not so beautiful teary eyed hopeless face into my soft and comfortable pillow. My pillow that has been through it all with me ..when all of the sudden I get a message from someone special.. Just saying they were thinking of me. Tender mercy. We talked and talked and eventually I felt so happy. 

I knew that it wasn't just a coincidence that they texted me but it was a sweet tender mercy . I'm so blessed. 

New song on the playlist. 

I know you want to hear it.

// good morning love - cubworld //

Smile:) love life & Look closely, because the closer you think you are, the less you will actually see..

Xx- desireeeeeeeee

Sweet kisses. And warm hugs.

You are my sunshine.

P.s. holy nuggets. New celebrity crush! Dave Franco 

Girls Camp

Hey, Well howdy, its been a week since I've written and now that I've captured your complete and full attention, you can not stop reading this until the paragraph ends. Becasue what I'm about to write is meant for YOU! Yes YOU. This story happens to be about my week at Girls Camp. The theme was Lighthouse of the Lord. As many of you might have read before I did not.. capital letters DID NOT want to go to girls camp .. but I realized the whole time satan was trying with all his mighty and absolute strength to keep me from hearing what I needed to hear at girls camp this year..

YOU. again.. yes im still talking to you. Youre AMAZINGGG. k no really. just stop for one sec to ponder. Youre a child of God!! Do you even realize how .. awesome that is? You were sent here, exactly where you are now for a unique reason. A divine purpose. Gosh, I'm so unorganized when I write..But you're so important and i want you to know that. I definitely needed to hear that at camp. Its always a good reminder to know who you are.. because honestly, I was starting to forget..getting too caught up in trying to fit in..worrying about what others were thinking about me..It was getting bad until I heard YOU are a beautiful daughter of God. Now..if you are reading this.. congrats dood. Its the end of the paragraph!

Next, at camp all the girls stood under the rain { now if you dont know me..I LOVE the rain and it puts me into a deep thinking mode} so as we stand we recite the Young women s theme

We are daughters of our Heavenly Father who loves us and we love him. We will stand as witnesses of God at ALL times and in ALL things and in ALL places as we strive to live the young women values which are.. faith, divine nature, individual worth, knowledge, choice and accountability, good works, integrity, and virtue. We believe as we come to accept and act upon these values we will be prepared to strengthen home and family. Make and keep sacred covenants, recieve the ordinances of the temple and enjoy the blessings of exaltation. 

As I was reciting it chills ran throughout my body as I spoke all the italicized words.

So now youre probably thinking..Uhm dood?..how does this tie in with the theme of girls camp? No worries im still here to tell yuh. Ill start off by asking you the question.. What is the purpose of a light house any way?

to bring those who are lost or have lost sight of where they need to go. So that they dont end up alone, hurt or stuck in between rocks or giant crashing waves of the sea. Like I said before..I was starting to get lost until the light of someones beautiful soft spoken words brought me home.

A child of God. Now im here and im going to let my light shine because we all get lost and we all need a light to guide us. My Heavenly father and Jesus Christ have always been a lighthouse for me and they are there for you as well. They will and ALWAYS and i know with all my heart that they are here for you. When you stumble and are feeling utterly and most indefinitely alone. Youre not! 

Ok now here is where im extremely greatful I took a chinese class. We were to have two lovely chinese students join us at camp. At first I was just messin around with one of the girls, speaking random bits and pieces of chinese I knew. In the end we were the best of pals! not even kidding. She taught me so much chinese we were able to carry on some conversations! We laughed so hard and even cried together! on the last day of camp she was crying because she didnt want to go home back to china because she loved it so much here. The girls came to me to ask her if I could help calm her. I made her laugh and she looked up at me with her swollen red watering eyes and jumped up to wrap her arms around me and she said " I LIKE YOU!" I really felt special at that moment. She wasnt a member of the LDS church but i sure as heck know she felt the loving spirit that week with us. 

Me: yay! we finally get to go home and shower Gu!

Gu: *crying* I DONT WANT TO SHOWER!!

i want to go home and play with you!

sweetheart.

Now let your light shine.

Know who you are

Love others

And live your life to its fullest!

Senior year doods.

Maholo.   

         

p.s I love you

So. Here it is.. I'm just going to say it.

I am NOT exited to go to girls camp tomorrow. Now I bet your sitting at bright computer screen thinking "come on des come on .. You know you'll have a great time" well duh! I always have a great time .. But I'm just dreadin it ..because my one n only homie moved away which means I got to make friends with the girls who don't like boys and ABSOLuTLEY love reading.. I mean, that's all they do.

But when I'm done listing all the cons of going to camp .. I eventually name the pro. Coming closer to my Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ! Learning patience and love for my fellow girls..and just lovin nature. 

 Now my sister just rolled over to me and said.. "Why do people like to read about your life?" ..{now if you didn't read that in a non puberty, high pitch sqweeky voice with some major attitude.. You did not read it right.} 

Well Isabel here's your answer.. They don't read my life.. They just look at the pictures..

And if you've made it thus far in reading .. Congrats.. You're a winner winner chicken dinner..and I really Do love you!

What a homie!

Boy oh boy, still waiting for my Homie to get his arse home. Tic tock.

You know, how about I just fly to Cali tomorrow and meet him there.. Totally miss girls camp For that beach. I could read my scriptures there. Camp on the beach. Promise I would.

Well . Here we go. Last year of Girly swirly camp for my papas ward. Good luck to me n what not. Much love!!

Have a great amazing time! You're so cutie. I love you all. Smile , because life is good. Maholo. Kisses. Huggs. Extra hugs. Xx-Desi

Dood keep smilin'

Bon Iver on

Why  Bon iver? Because it's thinking tunes, duh. It's the only music that keeps me sane when it comes around to boys.

He'll tear a hole in you, the one you can't repair. But i still love him i don't really care. It's better to feel pain than nothing at all. Keep your head up.

Boy troubles eh? Yep . They are here again. When things are going smooth and then you see or hear something and you step back for a second because you think it couldn't possibly be True. And then your heart stops and you can't really breathe.. But then you realize your heart has stopped, so you jump back to reality and your heart starts beating again..but not a regular heart beat.. A fire burning off beat. You try to catch your breathe but it almost seems impossible. You just want to earase all the precious moments to cure the burning hole through your chest. And then the regular question pops into your head..why can't you freaking move on?

It is only through labor and painful effort, by grim energy and resolute courage, that we move on to better things.

Blogs. Oh how you help me. I can just vent. It's great. 

Xx

Desi

When we were young we burned of love

So it's Sunday. Beginning of the week, fresh start, clean slate.. Whatever you might say. 

This Sunday for this young gal, or, at least I'd like to call myself young.. I went to churchy. Obviously because its the best. Duh.

And then I got a text from my main main saying he's leaving for Cali tomorrow night. My thoughts exactly : Noooooooooooooooooowuh

Basically he's going to be gone for the full Month of the July. Once again : Noooooooooooooooooowuh

So it called for some hangin out. He picked me up on his scooter { funnest!! Hair blowin in your face..tryin to look cute ..but you just can't because that's just a fuss girls deal with ..am I right? } went to his friends house and honestly.. I just want to be homie homies with his friends .. They are so funny and chill. I could live with that! Then when the time came that I had to return home I drove..

Now I bet you're saying .. Ok lamest story ever lived written done did. But no. It was a chill night. Had to be there or you're pretty much just square. So ja.

I'm very sad he's leaving tomorrow .

Only thing I have to say is: hurry jur arse home so we ken go on mo scooter rides dood.. Or just take me with you and ill love you for ever. Oh wait I already do.

{English majors please excuse my very improper grammar}

So who's jealous I saw dispicable me ?

All of you? Knew it.

Go see it! Cutest movie ever done did.

My brother is leaving ..departing.. The family for the month as well. Please excuse me as I grab a tissue and wipe all my sincere heart felt tears and boogies.

*sniffle sniffle*

He's leaving to Mexico. I'm honestly going to miss that bug!! But ya... Tears will be shed.

Guys. I am just in so much like right now. You don't even know do!

Gosh. I'm all about everything he does.

Slap me already before I get weird. 

"I'm not tryna pressure you.. Just can't stop thinking bout chu..... I just wanna know your name and maybe sometime we can do good ..hang out.. just chill"

Just

10/4 buddy

Over n out. 

Your gal 

Xx

Des

Woah.2 posts in one night. Oh snap call the cops. Nah I'm messin..

Ok I just have to say I LOVE the Fourth of July .. Like you don't even know.

It's somethin that runs in me. 

I got surprised to go to stadium of fire tonight! Freaking amazing.

Kelly freakin clarkson .. Holy good.

Nuff said.

It's crazy where time goes. Thinking about last year. Nights with korbin. Days with my best friend tori. 

And to think ..woaaaahhh.

Look at me now. How far I've gone. How many things have changed!!

Crazy. Now I'm wondering..where will I be next year? Who will I be with when I'm graduated. It's crazy. So live while we're young. That's 1D for the line

Fireworks>

Nuff said again.

Xx

Desi

4.july

Got a few hours to spare on such a lovely day. So better write my message now before my day gets busy.

First off.. Last night>

Last night my dad put on his big 4 of July party. SO much fun! I got to spend it with my sissy soul and all my beautiful family. Nothin gets better.

Props to my dad for just basically being the coolest most creative person around and having the coolest firework show! 

You guys HAD to be there. 

Ok ya..you're probably bored to tears because in the end you could care less right? So lets get to the good stuff..the pics. 

                       My yugi-o hair..

Oh and IM PROUD to be an American!!

Proud to be free. Blessed.

......

▲.  I can't sleep without my stuffed animal. {1.pillow pet} {2.valentines teddy} Childish I know but defiantly the comfiest things to sleep with. 

▲. I'm a bit obsessed with Bon iver and Ed Sheeran. And I listen to them constantly. Replay on replay. Their music just keeps me sane! So soothing and chill.

▲. I love Polynesians. I have no idea why I seem to be so intrigued by them but I am pulled in by their amazing personalities! I love people who can make me laugh and lemme tell yuh, they sure can! I'm all about that "aloha spirit"

▲. I LOVE rain storms. It has a wonderful place in my heart. And when it rains .. I'm completely happy! Now don't take me wrong. I'm not one of those girls who loves the rain because I so long to dream for my Prince Charming to kiss me in it. Nah, I just love it for the sound, color, smell & how much fun you can have in it. {I do though, would love if an amazing guy kissed me in the rain..it's on the bucket list ladies n gents}

▲. I also have a VERY soft spot for special needs children. I'm a big fan! Their personalities are so tender and innocent. I just love them! You have no idea.

▲. I'm a sun lover. ANYwhere where the sun seams to always shine and keep me warm enough to wear shorts..I'd live there. Hawaii.flordia.cali. All of the above.

▲. I'm a member of the church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints! And I love it from here to china and around the earth about Infiniti times. So #holla

▲. I'm scared of being home alone. Honestly though..if I hear any little creak of the stairs I have a small panic attack and kinda die a bit.. But just a bit.

▲. I love getting my back tickled and my hair played with!! Deee bestest.

▲. Still secretly love Hannah Montana ;) I mean who doesn't!

P.s! My friend Jenna Johnson is on So you think you can dance!! Please vote for her! She's absolutly amazing!!

So ya. Hope you enjoy my Terrible attempt to doodle . Bless.

V.      O.      T.     E. 

Tuesday night on Fox.

Xx. Your gal.  

Desiree Rogers